Thankful

Sometimes I can't believe that we live here. We are so blessed to be able to walk out our house and down the road and see this.

I was ten when our family moved to Newquay from Surrey. It was so exciting. What an exchange! We spent every spare moment at the beach, we'd go straight from school and often mum packed up a dinner and we'd eat it sat together on blankets, before running back into the sea. We'd drag ourselves back home (with pockets weighed down with shells and seaglass) so exhausted that after the sand was all showered off, we'd sleep so deeply in our beds. We walked barefoot and wore our hair in long plaits down our backs. We collected washed up jellyfish and scratched our names into the cliff. The summer felt so long. It's like in my mind all time between 2000-2004 was one long summer.
But slowly the novelty wore off. I turned 14 and I craved gigs, art exhibitions, even just a shop that sold Dazed and confused! I spent all my teens wishing I was in London. I was sick of 'the narrow minded people of the countryside, why does everyone stare at me when I get on the bus, Whats so weird about wearing a bright green leotard and David Bowie makeup to college?!' (True story- cringe!) I began to spend more time on myspace than on the beach and before I knew it, it was years before I'd been in the sea... and it was right outside our house! I felt bitter about our move down south and this became worse when Liam and I rekindled our friendship. He lived back in Surrey and I missed him so... but fast forward a few years, Liam learnt to drive, we fell in love and he joined me down here. We took day trips to neighbouring towns and walked for hours along the beaches. Slowly, slowly the sea drew me back.
And I'm here to stay. I can't really imagine life any other way. I'm so glad we can bring Queenie up in this environment. We have to make sure we get out there. I'm aware it's so easy to get caught up in every day things, to walk round to Aldi to buy some flour and not even look twice at these incredible sights. I'm making an effort to spend a lot of time on the beach. Today's the last day of winter and this spring and summer I want to recreate those feelings I had as a ten year old. To eat alfresco and feel sand on my toes, to swim in the ocean. To build castles and walk across the beaches when the tide is low.

These photographs are from a walk last monday with my sisters (and sister-from-another-mother.) The sun shone so bright and cold wind whipped our faces and we felt so alive. We saw dolphins and a seal out across the bay and laughed and they fought over who would carry Queenie next. We get to take these walks every day if we wanted. This is our home. God has been good to us to call us here.

8/52

"A portrait of Queenie Valentine, once a week, every week in 2013."

So love seeing this smiling face sat behind us in our new car. (How snuggly is that coat? We've been so blessed with beautiful hand-me-downs.)

This week we've spent most days taking long walks on the beach. The sun has been shining and we've been more than grateful. I've finally mastered a comfortable back carry in my wrap and Queenie is very happy up there. She bounces up and down with excitement and points at birds and the sea. When she's tired she falls asleep and I can feel her breathing deeply. Over this weekend she's pulling herself up on furniture and had finally learnt to sit herself up. Queenie spends hours playing with these wooden letters her Grammy and Gramps bought her. She loves listening to us talk about words and letters, moving them around to spell things out. She has enjoyed my sisters being off school this week, who have spent hours playing with her, especially my youngest sister Scarlett and sits on her shoulders, loving the attention. We're working through the sleeping little by little and I'm actually feeling so sleepy today because I think my body is so freaked at how much sleep I got last night.

Nice places in Edinburgh.

I want to state outright that this is by no means a city guide of Edinburgh. We have visited just a smidgen of the sites and because of Queenie feeling so down in the dumps, we really saw very little.
However we did visit a couple of really sweet places which I would thoroughly recommend if you are ever in Eddy.

First up, Lovecrumbs. Situated right near Edinburgh College of Arts, it is buzzing with students. Everything about this place was wonderful. It was decked out exactly the way I would like to have our house; Grey walls, old wooden furniture, antique china and cutlery, huge plants and plenty of delicious cake! And when I say delicious, mmmmmmm, oh wow.
The ladies working in there were super friendly too and even though we came in flustered and completely bedraggled from the wind and rain with a very grumpy baby in need of a change and feed, they sorted us out somewhere to sit and guided Liam to the bathroom to sort Queenie out. (We would recommend if with a wee one of your own, avoid the busier lunch time, so you feel a little less inconvenient in such a cool student hang-out!)
They apparently serve fabulous coffee but we just had tea and apple juice (India said the earl grey was scrumptious). We had a slice of chocolate fudge cake, salted chocolate tart (the best!) and a brownie. And Queenie had a parmesan scone. They were all great. I kinda wish that I had tried the coconut and white chocolate cake. Ohhhh, I'm getting hungry... I love cake. And if you do too, you can't give this place a miss.

They also sell yummy treats to take home. Liam and I bought some amazing Jam. Cranberry and Raspberry, I can't get enough of it! 

And second up, The Chocolate Tree. This place is aaaaall about chocolate. Thankfully, India booked the little back room because we were going with all her flat mates so would never have gotten a table otherwise. This place is popular! You can't visit and not try the Spanish Chocolate and churros. India and her friends said that would more than fill us up, but we are obviously piggies because we also went for cake. A slice of Pear and Pecan tart for me and Liam had a scrummy chocolate cherry tart, both were great. They messed up one of our orders a little so also bought us a plate of macaroons. The chocolate tree is perfect for an indulgent treat on a cold day.

Other places we would recommend:
Armstrong's are a vintage company with three stores across Edinburgh. Check out their Website for more info. I picked up a few gorgeous dresses for Queenie and that were in the sale. I love going to have a nosey around. they're full to the brim of beautiful pieces. And you can often grab a real bargain. The only shame is that the antique dresses hanging above aren't for sale. I had my eye on a couple for my sisters prom dress, ah well!
Bollywood: the coffee box. On the corner of the Meadows sits a little blue box, and from it Nutan Bala serves coffee and curry that she somehow cooks in this teeny space. We walked past a handful of times this year and last, but always at night so missed seeing it open, then finally, rushing to pick up Josh from the airport, it's open. And we have no time to sample some of her food or drink. I hear good things though and we always walked past with a giggle after reading her pun of the day. Read this write up from the List.
Well, there you go! Our best bits! xx

7/52

"A portrait of Queenie Valentine, once a week, every week in 2013."

A huge toss up between choosing this photo or the one I took on Valentines. (here) We went for this one because nothing is sweeter than a sleeping baby. I don't quite know how this happened. One minute i was sat feeding her then the next I'd got up and she'd curled around this cushion. So adorable.

This week Queenie has recovered just about and we've enjoyed seeing her come back to her bubbly self. She's always, always active, keeping herself busy with toys, making noise with wooden spoons and a tin bin (oh great, it looks like I'm living with two drummers) and has spent hours flicking through her books. We've read The Very Hungry Caterpillar many times, she stops and spends ages putting her fingers in the holes. She's addicted to raisins and dried apricots and I keep finding them everywhere. She's really got the hang of clapping, While she shuffles along, she stops, congratulates herself and carries on her way. It's terribly sweet to watch. Queenie is lucky she's so darn cute because at the moment she drives me nuts. At night she wakes every hour and we are exhausted. I hope we can work through this so she (and we!) can wake up in the morning without already feeling so tired! I find carrying her on my hip in my woven wrap reconnects us after a bad night. She's so snuggly and she leans into me when it's windy, which has been particularly so this week. Her face creased into a smile, loving the feel of it blowing on her face, peering out at every one we pass by.

Find more people entering the 52 project here. I've enjoyed finding new blogs to peer at, and were thrilled Jodi chose our 4th picture of Queenie as one of her favourites of the week. 

A day of love hugs an kisses.

Happy Valentines! I hope you've had a wonderful day!

The three of us had a couple of hours together before Liam had to leave for work. Queenie and I then went for a long walk and gathered some flowers for a valentines meal we held tonight. Liam had to go away straight after work for a couple days, so my youngest sisters and I planned a dinner at ours so I wouldn't feel lonesome.
I rather think its obligatory to eat either heart shaped or romantic hued foods on Valentines day. And if you can get both, that's perfect! We had beetroot gnocchi which was a nightmare to make, and looked pretty revolting but it was delicious with some fresh pesto and salad. Papa baked a heart shaped loaf (which I'm tucking into now with raspberry and cranberry Jam. mmmmm - how am I still hungry?!) For pudding I made a scrumptious cake. Earl grey with a rhubarb icing. yum yum yum yumm! It was such a special evening. The kitchen was decked in candles and flowers and Minnie put on some gorgeous music. I wore a pretty frock and felt like a human for once!
Queenie has been pretty difficult since being ill. She wants me all the time. She wakes up crying every couple of hours at night and wont settle again. I'm exhausted. I've been feeling quite fragile and emotional about being a good mother (also a little nervous because Liams got a new job-yay! but also boo- he'll have training and only be home at the weekends for nine weeks!)
But I looked over at her this afternoon at lunch and it all disappears. I thought oh boy, I love her more than ever before. I mean ahhh just look at these pictures, she's gorgeous, right?!

This morning in bed we sat together and read Queenie's favourite book, Hug. She insist on reading it over and over, turning the pages her self and flapping her arms with excitement at each new page. Between the pages I hid a teeny valentines card for her, which she actually spent time looking at. After the final time of reading it she turned to me and said 'huuuuh' and leant into me. I know it was probably just a complete coincidence but it was just what I needed after another terrible night. I melted, gee, talk about looove. Queenie Valentine we seriously love you! 

This is the first valentines I've really appreciated anything beyond love of a guy (or the broken hearted moping of a teenager!) I realised how much has really changed. Things have been so whirlwind that I haven't actually sat down and appreciated the difference that Queenie has made in my heart. Not just with her, but my appreciation of family has doubled. I've come to realise how wonderful my parents are as well.

I'm besotted. 

Anyway, enough gushy stuff for now. Tomorrow I will TRY and post up some of our edinburgh best bits. ta ra!

kiss kiss kiss

6/52

"A portrait of Queenie Valentine, once a week, every week in 2013."

While we drew, she sat and played on the floor. Scattering pencils and singing away to herself.

This week we have had a very, very sad, unwell babe. She cries a tired, croaky cry pleading 'ma ma ma'. She quietens as we hold her and we can feel her sob with her head rested on our shoulder. She seeks for comfort on our bodies, and we carry her closer and longer in her wrap throughout the day. At night she sleeps beside us. Today she shows signs of being a little better, she smiles and shuffles along the floor, sucking on raisins. In the bath, she splashes and laughs at her daddy's silly voices. She enjoyed the company of her grandparents this weekend, and we continue to pray she gets through this quickly.

Our wee bairn in bonny Scotland

At the end of January, we spent a week in Bonny Scotland. Edinburgh, to be precise. We drove the 9 and a half hour journey with a stop mid way in Birmingham. We were a bit nervous about how Queenie would take the travelling, but she was a star. The drive into scotland was beautiful. The snow dusted hills and dark, dense firs evoke such joy and wintery feelings. We were so excited to be on holiday, and so ready for adventure! Unfortunately our holiday decided to coincide with Queenie's first proper illness and the erupting of three teeth! It was also our first long trip with the wee bairn and soon realised we couldn't get as much done as we had first hoped. With all the nappy changes and breastfeeding cafe stops, we found time was gone so quickly. Not to mention the strong icy winds and all of that rain! We quickly learnt to appreciate the time away together and forget about getting lots done. 

Of course you may remember my lovely sister India lives in Edinburgh and it was her birthday while we were there. It was nice to spend some time with her and to see her adorable flat mates. We ate together a few times, and she took us to some delightful cafes. On Saturday we drove to Glasgow to visit an old friend I hadn't seen for years. We were able to meet each others menfolk and talk art, church, babies and work. I instantly remembered what bosom buddies we were and despite years apart we're still so similar. 

It was Queenie's first time in a hotel room. After family baths we'd snuggle in our big, fresh bed and read books then I'd feed her and we'd all sleep. They were my favourite moments of the trip. I fell more in love with these two over this holiday. They are just the best.

On the morning of our final day, we woke and sat a while people watching out the window. We felt refreshed and ready to return home. Our hearts yearned for the sea, our kitchen and the slowness of the countryside.

Next week I'll share a few places we went that I would definitely recommend for you to visit if ever in Edinburgh.

5/52

I thought last weeks post was late...

"A portrait of Queenie Valentine, once a week, every week in 2013"

A very excited lady. She licks the cold wind blowing in her face, enjoying our first stop in Scotland.

This might be my favourite photo of Queenie ever. She was so good in the car and so grateful to stop and stretch out and play with us before getting back for the final stretch. This week she has gained two teeth (her first ones!). She met loads of new people over the week and was good with them all. But she was happiest sat quietly on the floor in our ginormous hotel room, pulling all the clothes from her suitcase. Her favourite books this week are Hug and Guess how much I love you (a childhood favourite of my own), together we have read them over and over. Last week I mentioned she enjoyed piano on the iPad, but thats nothing in comparison to the way she loves the drums. On sunday morning we recorded her first song. It's pretty amazing.